Summertime Insecurities
Heyyy guyss!! It has been a MINUTE sense I made a written blog. But Today I wanna talk about a genuine thing that happens to me every summer and I am guessing I am not the only one. I feel like when summer comes my confidence just shoots to the floor. And I never would want to say anything because as someone who grew up in the mindset of "girls need to be confident in who they are in the Lord and if you feel insecure then its your fault for not trusting God enough" it was very hard for me to admit when I was struggling because I thought that meant I was failing in my faith as well. Which yes, I know who I am in the Lord and have full confidence in His love for me. BUT that doesn't automatically make the struggle of body image and comparison go away. I think that it is a great goal to have but one that will probably never fully be met until I am face to face with Jesus in heaven one day.
I think something so frustrating with the summer is swimsuits. I honestly think the reason why it is so hard is because it truly is not a natural thing. It is soooo vulnerable to where a bikini and basically having people see your whole body and it is a very hard thing to feel 100% confident in, I think it is super important to understand that and give ourselves grace. And it is frustrating to see the culture we live in be such a "you don't like how you look, well then go change it". And when it is from a place of doing something because you hate yourself instead of love, then I think that is where we need to come from a different approach.
With going through all this mental battle about something so impossible to change and fix i learned that instead I needed to pivot and take a different approach which is HARD but worth it. And I am still learning but I just wanted to share.
Instead of focusing on my appearance and trying to force myself to love it, I decided to first take care and show myself love in other ways. I made a list of goals of things to focus on which I will list here:
Ways I can pour into myself:
Physically
do PT and go on walks
Care about my looks cuz I love myself not hate myself (things like keeping up with haircuts and skincare)
Take vitamins
3 Meals a day
Keep my space clean
Mentally
do Devos and plan on my app
write encouraging messages to myself
Don’t avoid important feelings
Other
balance work and fun
Hang out with people i love
Pour into my business
Dressing in ways that I love not that are about my body or anything else
So I started with a very simple one, I did my laundry (which i hate usually) and reorganized my room and closet. And I lit some candles and viewed it as taking care of myself. And when I tell you it made me feel more love and proud of myself for something other than my looks... like its hard to put into words.
I also took a practical step and took the full body mirror out of my room because i would find that I would just look at it and pick myself apart which is just not helpful at all. And on the mirror in my bathroom I asked loved one to write encouraging notes for my mirror (which is not being needy it is simply asking for help) which if this is a struggle you have I would encourage you to do the same.
Also, spend time with the One who created you and cherishes you so much. The Lord does not shame you for having a hard time with this, He just wants you to see yourself how he sees you, which is not defined by your body but defined by His love for you!
I am still on this journey but wanted to share because i know it might help someone not feel so alone ❤️
Have a beautiful day!!
Xoxo,
Annika Grace
