Long time no seeee! Oh my goodness this has just been such a crazy few weeks I have just been so sick and figuring out my endometriosis. Which we will save that for another blog post. But I am feeling better now praise the Lord (even tho it is a constant battle). Something that has been on my mind recently is how much pressure there is in your 20s to have everything figured out and be where everyone else it. I think that this is someone that everyone experiences and something i heard in a podcast recently (the Unsolicited Advice Podcast) is that comparison just flat out does not work because everyone's story is different. I didn't realize how much i would compare myself until i heard this because I thought you could only compare yourself in a physical way. But I realized how i had been so dissatisfied with my life and I was like why don't I love where I am at in my life and i realized that everything in my life will happen in its time. Like for example wanting to get married, that will happen and have its time but right now isn't that time haha obviously and i want to let that time have its time and not wish I was there instead. Because literally all that does is make you unhappy. Literally so basic I know but seriously there is so much pressure in college and after college to have everything figured out. Also everyone has there own idea of what the 'perfect timeline for life is' but literally who ever said that there is a perfect timeline for life.... it just doesn't make sense. Like one of my best friends will probably get married this summer and also some of my friends don't want to seriously date until they are like 26. Everyone has a different time and place for everything. And its not bad to see people and say 'wow that looks nice like i want that someday' about no matter what it is. If its a healthy lifestyle, a career, a deeper faith, whatever it may be there are steps you can take now to get there. I think sometimes I can get that sort of woe is me attitude and that is just not very helpful. It's okay to have feelings of sadness and feel those feelings but also there is a point where we need to see where we are now, and also see what is happening in our own life. Like when you think about it, everyone has something going for them and there are little steps that we can take to enjoy where we are.
Also this is a little tangent but I feel like in early highschool i had moments where I was very insecure about my personality but then like got more comfortable in it, and i feel like it is happening again. Like something about me is that I will speak up, like if no one else will I will. I don't put up with people talking bad about someone I love or about me. And I had a moment this last weekend were i was like Annika why can't you just relax and be more like so and so. But then i was like you know what, no! I am not going to let myself feel bad about who i am. Like i really can't do much to change my personality and I don't want to. So my recent mentality has just been I am who i am and I love that. And instead im gonna be that girl who owns it.
Anyways, that's my blog post for today!